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My mom’s love is conditional, she thinks she belongs in a rich neighborhood but has no job! PLEASE HELP!!!?
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9 Responses to My mom’s love is conditional, she thinks she belongs in a rich neighborhood but has no job! PLEASE HELP!!!?
Your mother is a bitch. Consult a lawyer. Good day.
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well I have a very good oprion for you, since she is forcing you guys to go to church talk to the pastor, I bet he would be very interesten int his, and just to let you know this may be god giving you a chance to be close to him, I am sorry you have to go trhough this. seems like your mom is going to have to suffer a lot before learning her lesson. and if she called your sister that is because your mom is blaming you guys about all the things she dosent like of her own life.
I wonder if at any point in your life you or your sister talked to her about this. and if so how?
well in case you want you could write to me at any time good luck!!!
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Talk to a school councilor.
Also keep studying and someday you will become a rich and influential President of Science.
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Have you ever thought of applying for emancipation? According to the site below, the legal age that you can apply for emancipation is fourteen.
As an emancipated minor, you can live where you want, sign legal documents, visit the doctor or dentist when you want to, and many other benefits.
This might be a way out. Good luck.
http://www.teenparents.org/emancipation.html
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If you could be reassigned parents, I think everyone would sign up to receive new parents.
I was in a similar situation when I was your age. I made some big mistakes that I regret. I would have done a lot of things different. Each situation is unique.
Seeing that this is mostly a rant more then a question, my advice would be to learn new ways to channel that rage more constructively.
http://www.teenparents.org/emancipation.html
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You could be emancipated. Then you can be in charge of your own life and affairs. The only problem with that is money and where you can live. Perhaps you can live with a family friend or a relative that also is on poor terms with your mother?
I don’t think CPS is the best way to go because you could end up with equally shitty parents. And running away will get in the way of your aspirations for the future because you wouldn’t be able to attend school. If you do have “high goals for [yourself] academically” then this option will not suffice.
Until then, I highly recommend staying with a family member or friend that you trust for the majority of your time. Maybe go to the public library or a park near your house. Spend most of your time away from your mother. She can’t yell at you if you aren’t around. Start saving up money for legal purposes if you choose to be emancipated.
I hope this helps.
http://usmarriagelaws.com/search/united_states/emancipation_of_minors/index.shtml
http://www.youthrights.net/index.php?title=Emancipation
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Your mum sounds like my mum,but my mum refuses to attempt to do anything or apply for any jobs or go to college,or do anything at all.She alwqays goes on about how anything was possible in the past,and she could have done anything 10/15/20 years ago,but nothing is possible now.She hate where we live,and I looked for houses,but nowheres good enough.I have to get together money for a deposit for her to move,my sister pays her dentist bills,if shes in a bad mood she screams at me,Im not allowed to make any decisions for myself really,and my dad is an alcoholic and is gone from her life,so she complains about him.So,I have an idea what its like.:)
Its not easy having a parent like this.I think my mum just doesint think she is capable,but all this completely stands in my way,as everything is more difficult.I would advise you to possibly get an aunt or relative to talk to her and try and get her to be more reasonable.DO NOT run away or starve yourself,you will suffer from this,and nothing will be changed for the better.Consintrate on your school work and do as well as you possibly can,and you can leave and go to university in 4 years time,which is quicker than you think.Really consintrate on your school work,get a scholership if necessary.Your sister is 17 and could leave soon anyway,just consintrate on your school work,and dont accidently get some girl pregnant,and then you can leave.Maybe theres an aunt or relative who you could move in with?
If you need a quite place to work go to the library.Im not sure how much cps will help,especially if your not being hit or abused,they could make the situation worse.DO NOT run away from home though,that will mess up your educatin,and make things much worse.Good Luck.
http://usmarriagelaws.com/search/united_states/emancipation_of_minors/index.shtml
http://www.youthrights.net/index.php?title=Emancipation
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I understand your rage. Life sure has been tough for you, losing your dad etc. I know its hard to focus on someone other than yourself, especially when you’re weighed down in your own problems, but I think you’re asking the wrong question; instead of wondering about your mums snobbery, you should wonder whats wrong with her. Someone who has to make an imaginary life, for the sake of appearance, is VERY insecure. I don’t believe she’s a gold digger, or your dad would’ve left enough for you all. Your mum sounds ashamed of her lack of education, has no faith in her ability or self-respect, as shown by sleeping with someone to ensure a grade. She’s also a widow & suddenly plunged into being a single mum – scary & hard. Try showing her YOU have faith & believe in her. She sounds like she needs counselling. Her anger doesn’t show a lack of love – she’s falling apart & striking out in fear. Don’t let it affect your studies – you’re obviously smart. Do though understand your mums not coping & needs proffesional help.
http://usmarriagelaws.com/search/united_states/emancipation_of_minors/index.shtml
http://www.youthrights.net/index.php?title=Emancipation
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Talk to an adult you trust. They can help you (and your sister.) This can be a neighbor, doctor, teacher, coach, another relative (have you tried your relatives?), just about anyone, really but you definitely need to get help.
When your sister turns 18 she can get out of the house and try living on her own. I’d recommend you try going with her, but at $8/hr she’s going to have a hard time supporting herself, let alone making enough money to take care of you as well. Since you’re still young, it’ll be hard for you to find a job, much less one that pays decently.
Going to CPS might be an option. At the very least you should be able to connect with a social worker who can at least give you some options, and upon seeing your mother in action, may take some actions of their own on your (and your sister’s) behalf.
At the very worst, start counting the days until you turn 18. I had friends in college who had come out of bad situations from home, and managed to declare themselves independent for the purposes of getting financial aid to put themselves through school. It wasn’t easy for them. They still had to take jobs to make enough money, and still ended up with a ton of debt at the end of school, but at least they had a degree and an education. This allowed them to get a job and pay back the loans. I’m not saying it’ll be easy, but at least there’s a way, so long as you have the will and work hard.
Good luck…I really hope something comes through for you.
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